Feng shui is a very powerful tool for optimising your home for love, and for helping to boost – as well as harmonise – your relationship. Whether you want to improve an existing relationship or marriage, or find a new partner – feng shui remedies can help. Top love feng shui tips include:
1) Love/relationship/marriage area
Sort out the love/relationship corner of your home/apartment/bedroom. The love/relationship area of your bedroom is the top right hand corner from the door. Make sure that you don’t have any clutter here. Keep this area vibrant, alive and sexy. Traditional feng shui remedies for energising your love/relationship corner are: light (lamps, candles), crystals (add sparkle), plants (help to grow the relationship), images which represent love (e.g. hearts / a couple kissing / the word “Love” / a pair of doves, etc) help to inspire love and harmonious relationships.
2) Bedrooms – places for love
After sorting out the love/relationship corner of your bedroom, follow these tips to optimise the energies of your bedroom:
• Wooden beds: the most important piece of furniture in your home is your bed. A wooden frame with a solid headboard and a good mattress without metal springs (ideally an organic foam mattress is best) should be changed every few years, but especially when one moves to a new home.
• Placement: place your bed in a power position (in relation to the door and windows), making sure you have a view of the door as you lie in bed so that you can feel secure.
• Mirrors: if you have mirrors in your bedroom – round or oval ones are the best shape (see the tip on flowing lines and shape below). Position the mirrors so that you cannot see yourself when lying in bed.
• Materials: natural materials such as cotton, wool, linen and silk are best.
• Side tables: a matching table on each side of the bed with lamps, etc, will create a balanced and secure environment for your relationship.
• Working in bedrooms: avoid work or work-related objects, anything that represents work, too many books. Ideally, bedrooms should be places for rest and love. But if, for whatever reason your bedroom needs to serve another function, don’t worry. Just make sure that you have a clear distinction and separation between different modes of living and working.
• Colours: romantic pastels and relaxing colours are best. Avoid blue which can have too calming an effect. If you already have blue walls just add touches of red, for example a cushion cover, as a symbol of passion – however don’t over do it.
• Sick Building Syndrome (SBS) includes geopathic stress (GS), electromagnetic fields (EMF) and dirty electricity (DE) – all of which can can create a lot of electro-pollution in your bedroom. Keep electrical gadgets to a minimum and switch them off for the night if possible – as they will all create electromagnetic radiation which can affect how well you sleep.
• Beams, sloping ceilings, light fittings and cupboards above the bed: all these will create an uneasy feeling because subconsciously we feel unsafe when things are hanging above our heads. Position your bed away from these where possible.
3) Love and harmonious relationship images and symbolism
Choose symbols that will enhance love, harmonious and fun relationships. Avoid solitary pictures and stark landscapes. Choose images of happy people, couples, animals, soft and romantic, uplifting scenes. Everything you have in your love zone has semiotic connotations. Learn how to read them.
• Red colour and candles
Candles and the colour red (fire element) symbolise passion and love. Add small accents of red to your bedroom. For centuries red flowers and red underwear were used to fire our passions and love.
• Flowing lines and shapes
Flowing, curvaceous lines and oval, round shapes – which encourage more harmony, romance and love – are preferred by most people (see my Environmental Psychology research into how shapes affect us). Square and angular/sharp shapes and edges create uneasy feelings and in feng shui are referred as cutting energy or shar chi/energy. To add extra harmony to your relationship have some photos of you both together in oval or round frames – which have one unbroken line, like a wedding ring.
• Soft materials
Soft, delicate materials and furnishings are more relaxing than hard, shiny ones. Have lots of soft (eg silk) colourful cushions.
4) Connect with the archetypical energy of love and St. Valentine
• Use a favourite image or photo that represents love to you – as your mobile wallpaper.
• Celebrate Valentine’s Day in your own special way – big or small. Even if you’re not in a relationship, use that day to contemplate what kind of relationship you’d like to have. Writing a wish list of the qualities you want in your ideal partner/relationship is always the first step. Write down what you want and what you don’t want so when you meet that person you’ll recognise them easily and you won’t miss ‘the boats and helicopters‘. Or if you don’t want a relationship – think about the love you have for yourself. All love starts with loving yourself first.
• Contemplate your existing relationship/s. What make them work and what is missing? Remember, the 80/20 rule (Pareto principle) which states that 20% percent of effort creates 80% of results. In relationships, if you follow that rule you’ll have an amazing rapport. If you focus on the 80% of the things that are working in your relationship (and put what is not working into the 20% department) – you’ll have a very balanced and harmonious connection. Most problems in relationships can easily be resolved with the right communication. Learn non-violent communication to improve how to put across your observations, feelings, needs and requests. Read: Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships or have a quick look at the NVC model
• Hug somebody – facts about the benefits of hugging
Facts About Hugging
Read love poems by Rumi or other poets
“The minute I heard my first love story,
I started looking for you, not knowing
how blind that was.
Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere.
They’re in each other all along.” – Rumi